This Too Shall Pass...

Those words linger in my head always. Days come and go, some harder that others. Today has been a hard day. As I am emotionally and physically weak today very fiber in my body rather be at home, in my bed.
“The ache for home lives in all of us, the safe place where we can go as we are and not be questioned.”
- Maya Angelou

Please pray for my family for we have lost a member. My uncle Larry passed away this morning. Also pray for our dear family friends The Brogle’s and Wayne’s Lloyd is having some heath complications.

“Faith is like electricity. You can't see it, but you can see the light.”

Guess What!?!?!?

Im selling Avon and Mark!!!!
Checkout my new online store!
www.youravon.com/virginiaadams
Where you can order whatever you want pay online and have products shipped directly to your house!

Has seen better days

I hate when I have really bad Mondays, it’s foreshadowing the coming up week. I've had a rough couple of days; look at me wrong and tears will begin to well up in my eyes. I'm at this point where I am unhappy…everyday.

I have so many thoughts running through my head I can’t keep them straight.

My dad is a low life and if it wasn’t for my nieces I would disown him like he disowned my sister and I when we were babies.

I hate my job…I just really want to do what makes me happy.

I wish I had money for school…

I wish I didn’t feel so freakin alone

I wish for change….of any kind. I've been in this same pattern for so long I can hardly stand it.

I don’t understand why I let my dad get to me. He’s the same asshole he’s always been but yet I keep thinking maybe he will change.

Its days like these where I really miss my Pap. I try to remember him, recall some of the memories he shared but all I keep thinking about is him laying in that casket with my hands on his hard cold chest and felling my knees give out as I hit the floor, screaming for some kind of relief from all the pain. I wish that wasn’t what I thought about each time I think about my Pap. I love him more that anything in this world and I knew he loved me like I was really his granddaughter or daughter for that matter.

I don’t know anymore… I understand we learn from all the things we go through in life but is all this heart wrenching pain necessary? I just wish God would give me some kind of answer. I'm beginning to loose faith…on everything. I feel like I am just space taking up a fraction of this dying earth. I want to make a difference. I want to make my life worth while but it seems the only way to accomplish any of that you must have money…I don’t have money.

I know that Makayla will pass very soon. I also know that when this happens I loose it completely. I'm not sure if I can prepare myself for loosing her. Is there anyway you can prepare yourself for the death of a loved one, let alone a child? I pray god gives me strength…more than usual.

I feel like I'm half here, the rest of my body in pieces while the reaming half beings to chip away. It’s hard to feel yourself crumble with no idea how to stop it from happening, to keep whole. Pray, pray everyday for my low life dad, more my beautiful fighting niece, and for myself, who keeps trying to find the light.